PLAN B?

This post is sort of a follow-up to my previous post "God Said No" because the story doesn't end there.

All of these thoughts flooded me as I was completing the required seminar for Darci's adoption.

I had chosen a training seminar on talking openly with children about adoption.

There was a story about a parent telling their child they had decided to adopt when they were unable to have children of their own.

That story got me to thinking.


And then worrying.


How would I feel if my parents told me that?

"We adopted you because we couldn't have children of our own."

Children of our own.

It would be like telling them they were Plan B.

A second option

Second best.

Yuck.

Kinda makes me sick to my stomach.

I don't want my girls to EVER think they were Plan B.

They were Plan A.

I just didn't know it.

But God did.

And that's what I plan to tell my girls.

God Said No

Today I was completing an online seminar that is required for our adoption.

Some of the reading material got me to thinking and remembering..........

Years ago, Keith and I were in our early-thirties and married about 10 years or so. We had been trying to start our family for years.....we had been very patient thinking that it would happen...eventually.

But it didn't.

Years passed.

No baby.

Finally we decided to seek professional help for our infertility.

Time continued to pass as we endured test after test, procedure after procedure.

All the while.....all of our close friends were having one child after another.

I vividly recall lying on the couch one evening after we had undergone what would be our last "procedure".

I laid there with my hand across my belly crying out to God......

"Please God, let this work......let us have a baby.

Just one baby.....that's all I ask."

But.....God said no.

And I was angry.

I was angry for a long time after that.

I decided that if God did not see fit to give me a baby it must be because He knew I wouldn't be a good mother.

Done.

End of Story.

Move on with my life.

But then......

Keith and I became born again and Jesus opened our eyes and our hearts to adoption.

What I didn't know then and what I just suddenly realized, is that.......

While God did say no to that prayer all those years ago,

it was not because I would not be a good mother

But because He had other plans for me!

As I look at my adorable daughters today.....oh how I thank God that He said no!

Have I told you lately how much I simply adore these two daughters of ours?

Thank you Lord for making us a family!

Thank you for unanswered prayer.

Charity at Home

Okay....I'm going to get on my soap box again.

You have been warned!

We have noticed something that annoys us.....and hurts us.

A comment.

Perhaps made in ignorance.....perhaps not.

It started back in 2004 when we first began the process to adopt our precious Ande.

It continued with our precious Kaci's adoption.

And....we continue to hear it today.

What is it you ask??

This comment takes many different forms, but the meaning behind it is all the same.

"Charity begins at home."

"I believe we should take care of those in need here in the U.S. first."

"Aren't there any children available for adoption right here int he U.S.?"

We truly believe that we have been called by God to adopt.

We do not know why God has lead us to Chin@.

Why He continues to lead us there.

Believe me.....I do not look forward to all that is involved with an international adoption.

I am truly not looking forward to spending 15 hours cooped up on a cramped airplane.

I truly am not looking forward to being in a strange country for 2 weeks where few people speak english and the food is different.

I truly am not looking forward to the rock hard beds, the stares, and the smoking everywhere.

But I will go.

Out of obedience.

And because that is where our daughter is....that is where Darci is.

We searched God's word for an explanation.

Why us? Why Chin@?

And do you know what??

Not once does His word say.......

"Charity begins at home."

Honest! Not once....nadda.

It does say......

"Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless: do justice to the afflicted and needy."

~ Psalm 82:3

"Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction and to keep himself unspotted from the world."

~ James 1:27

"Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me." ~Matthew 25:40

We are all children of God.

Right here in the good old U.S. as well as those half way around the world in Russi@, Ugand@, Guatemal@ and Chin@.

What makes us more worthy of charity?

If you truly believe that charity begins at home.....I'd like for you to do me a favor.

You look in the eyes of those lonely, hurting children and you tell them that.

Tell them they are not worthy of our help because they were not fortunate enough to be born in the right country.

Tell them.

I can't.

I won't.

Something I have found to be curious though.......

Of all the people who have made this comment to us.....

Not one of them have ever adopted.

Not one of them have ever even been a foster parent or a mentor.

Not one.

Something that really bothers me.....something that hurts my heart more than anything else is this.....

I used to think the same way.

And probably even said "charity begins at home" more than once in my life time.

But....that was in my previous life... before I was born again.

Before I saw the light.

Before Jesus came in to my life and changed my heart.

Before I knew the enormity of the orphan population around the world.

Before I looked in to the eyes of those hurting children.

Don't get me wrong....I am by no means saying we don't need help right here in the U.S.

We do.

All I am saying is this.....

Open your eyes and your hearts to the plight of all children.....all over the world.

And if you still continue to feel that "charity begins at home"......please keep your opinion to yourself.

Don't condemn those of us who feel differently.

I would never want my children to hear those words and think that they were not worthy just because of the country they happened to be born in.